So I Got That Going For Me...Which Is Nice

This past weekend, I went golfing for the first time in about a month. Anyone who has ever played golf knows that time away from the game doesn't translate into a good score. Instead, it means that you are probably going to venture into different parts of the golf course you haven't seen before, searching for your ball. It also means that you are probably going to utilize some colorful language, either out loud or in your head, because you aren't playing as well as you think you should. On this particular day, it was very windy and I found myself trying to do things on the course that were beyond my particular skill set. It was like I had a devil on my shoulder telling me to do one thing and an angel on the other shoulder telling me to stay within my game. These conflicting narratives got my head so messed up that I couldn't even focus on improving my game. You can guess how the round went.

On the way home from the course, I got to thinking about all the stupid shots I made during my round and how I could have scored better if I just made some different decisions. I was focusing so much on everything that went wrong that I didn't take into consideration that I did do some things right. For example, I hadn't played golf in over a month, but I made a decision to stop working and go out and enjoy the nice weather doing something I like to do. I also got to spend some time with friends and engage with them about things that weren't work related. Finally, I got to take care of my own mental well being and fill up my bucket a little as I head into another work week. These are all good things, but they were overshadowed in my mind by my constant internal criticism of my game.

You see, too often we find ourselves in negative head space because we are our own worst critics and we expect better. When we do this, we take our minds off of the fact that we are doing a lot of things right. We rationalize to ourselves that we shouldn't focus on the good things because it might come off as being okay with average and that we aren't pushing ourselves enough to do better. We listen to the voice in our head that makes us feel like we are not enough, when in reality, we are more than enough. We have conditioned ourselves to only focus on improvement that we sometimes lose sight of the fact that being average is okay sometimes, especially if what we are average at is helping us take care of ourselves physically and emotionally. For me, that means that I have to be okay at being an average golfer. I'm already average at a lot of other things like cooking, gardening, and video games, so I need to be okay with it happening at golf as well. Accepting that you are average at something, doesn't mean that you have to be content, it just means that maybe you can cut yourself a little slack. 

At the end of the day, we all need to realize that if everyone was great at everything, nobody would be exceptional and there would be no need to grow at all. Fortunately, that isn't the case because we would miss out on some really cool experiences. We are all unique in our own ways and we excel in things that others may find difficult. It doesn't make us better than anyone else, it just makes us different and that is okay. I've come to grips with it, so I have that going for me, which is nice.

#FORWARD #FORGE