Vulnerability

 

Not sure if you knew this, but most days I post a quote on my Twitter account under the hashtag #OwnYourEpic that displays a quote and a personal aphorism that tells my truth. I started it a couple of years back because I wanted to remind myself that my experiences have helped shape me into the person I am today. I also wanted to share this experience in the hopes that it helps others who may be going through specific circumstances and can find hope and encouragement knowing that there are others who have had similar experiences and that we are all a work in progress. That is the foundation of #OwnYourEpic and I share these tweets not to lecture, but to remind everyone that we can continually learn and grow from the experiences we encounter on a daily basis.

Last week, I posted the quote above and it must have resonated with a few people because I had quite a few likes, retweets, and direct messages from people expressing that they found a lot of their own truth in the quote, but struggled with letting other people see it because it requires immense vulnerability to do so. As I read these messages, I reflected a lot on why vulnerability is such a hard concept to embrace and I didn't need to look very far to find the answer. The truth is, all you need to do is search inward and you will discover a lot of things about yourself that you hide from others because being vulnerable is scary and you don't want the light to shine on you.

If we are truly honest with ourselves, we avoid vulnerability because it exposes us and highlights the things about ourselves that we are not proud to admit. We like to feel as if we are competent and have everything put together because it gives the impression to others that we are comfortable in our own skin and we know what we are doing. For some, vulnerability is practiced with some trusted individuals and for others, vulnerability is avoided at all costs because the fear of letting others know that perfection is only a mirage is too much pressure. The reality is that showing vulnerability is what makes us relatable humans and demonstrates to others that in spite of what appearances may say, when the curtain is pulled back, we all have areas for growth and opportunity if we can first admit it to ourselves. You don't have to go to social media and share your flaws with the whole world and you certainly don't need to unload your baggage on others who don't even know you, but you do need to know that vulnerability will help you become a better version of yourself and will allow you to find out some truly amazing things that you didn't know before. The first step in this process is being brave and practicing vulnerability even if you suck at it.

As a leader, there is a lot of risk involved in showing vulnerability. There are those that may take advantage of the situation and in the worst case scenario, use that vulnerability to manipulate and do something sinister. Knowing this doesn't mean you should be guarded all the time, but rather, should inform you about how much you should share regarding your blind spots. We all know those people who probably share too much, but you can't fault them for at least trying to be vulnerable. After all, it's better to have tried than to not try at all. If you continue to practice your vulnerability with others, you may find that you actually have more in common with those you work with and those that you are charged to lead. This, in turn, can lead to better conversations, growth, and improved cultures. The key is being open to the possibility that your own vulnerability might make you a better person. You might suck at it, but at least you will have been brave enough to try.

#Onward #FORGE